We, as mothers, all want the best for our beautiful and intelligent children. We work our hardest to ensure our children are healthy and happy. But being as we are all very different people at our core, our ideals of what makes a “good” mother and “happy” children varies greatly. If you don’t believe me, take an evening and sit down and watch a Trading Spouses or Wife Swap. It is one of my favorite sociological experiments and also a good way to see the inner workings of my fellow moms. There is rarely a mom on the the show that feels like she is doing a “bad” job raising her kids, even if I may think her methods are wacky. You will also see the children mostly defend whatever the mom does and that is because her children love her and that is truly the only sign of a “good” mom.
Which brings me to my case in point. We all have what I call, “Mom Crazy” or “Parenting Manifestos”. Maybe you don’t believe in feeding your child processed sugar or foods, maybe it’s a belief that daycare causes a disconnect, or TV is a terrible thing. Maybe you think that certain dyes are toxic, animals spread disease to children, or that hard work makes a well adjusted individual later on. Along with these ideas you probably have hours upon hours of research and facts to back them up. That is wonderful, you are a wonderful mother for taking the time and energy to make certain that your child’s health and well being are improved and their quality of life will be better.
Just like your opinion on politics, religion, and sports teams, they are just your ideals. And while they are important to you, it is equally important that while you embrace them that you not become the person that preaches to other moms. One that looks down openly on the woman giving her child a Hi-C juice box in the park (high fructose corn syrup…gasp!). Don’t we also want to teach our children to respect others beliefs and to understand differences are what make us special in this world? (Or maybe that is just one of MY “Mom Crazy’s”-ha ha)
You never know what drives another Mom to do what she does. So while I encourage embracing the heck out of whatever you do that makes you feel like the “Super Mom” that you are, that we show a little patience and kindness for those Moms that don’t. There is nothing worse as a Mom than taking your child to the store and getting snide looks or remarks for certain things and looking over and seeing an insanely well behaved child in their cart. We are in this together, Ladies! We get enough grief from people with no children that want to tell us how to raise our kids and what we should do differently.
Let’s be more supportive of each other and certainly more tolerant. We are ALL doing our best and what is more important, we all love our kids! That, to me, is the only defining characteristic of a healthy and happy child…one that is loved.
I'm just living minute to minute, hour to hour, day to day.