Being appropriate? Ain’t nobody got time for that!

ImageI have worn some risque items of clothing in my day. I have been known to push more than a few envelopes. I will admit that I even relished in some of the looks of “how dare she” in my wild and reckless youth. Life is all about taking risks and being noticed. Or, at least, that is what I used to believe.

Until I was the “skanky” mom at the local pool with my young son in tow.

Was I wearing a thong, you may wonder, or something that would cause a Catholic man to blush whilst on his was to the confessional? Um, nope. Just a two-piece. A plain black two-piece that tied at the neck and had boy short bottoms. Though you would think, by the stares that I received, I might have well have just shown up in my birthday suit and smile.

It took me a few minutes to process why I was being glared at in my extraordinarily understated bikini. Was it my tattoos? Did I have a boogey in my nose? What was the deal here?

Then I slowly visually panned around at the other moms attending the “Tot Time” swim at my neighborhood pool and noticed that there seemed to be a trend that I was unaware of (Me? Unaware of a trend? Sounds about right.) called the “tankini”.

ImageYes, I agree, it looks like a one piece until the wind blows and you can see it is has two different parts.

So, there I am in my bikini, sitting in a sea of these. Um…okay. The “how dare she” looks that were once reserved for shorts that put the micro in mini and backless shirts is now reserved for your standard two-piece. Did not get that memo, apparently. So I did what any mom would do when they realized that they accidentally wore lingerie to the pool and put my tank top back on.

Whoa, whoa, whoa! Did I just succumb to mommy peer pressure? Who am I right now?

I saw the smug, self-satisfied, catty suburban moms gleaming with satisfaction that they shamed me back into my shirt and I immediately decided that I was letting their judgmental bullsniff get to me and that just was not who I am or who I want to be.

I am a good mom regardless of what I wear. And I looked darn good in that bikini.

So I sauntered over, took the shirt off, and smiled. I (trademark) pageant waved at the biggest group of tankini-clad haters and then jumped into the pool to play with my son.

So, the skanky mom at the pool I may be, but caring about what other people think is for the insecure people in the world. Me? I did not succumb to peer pressure in my teens and I am certainly not going to start now because a bunch of uptight moms give me dirty looks.

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Amber Perea View All →

I'm just living minute to minute, hour to hour, day to day.

31 Comments Leave a comment

  1. Good on you! There is way to much judgement being handed out to moms from other moms, it’s refreshing to hear a story about some who didn’t pay it much attention. And really, more jealously probably that you had a bikini body after a baby πŸ™‚

    • Thank you! I may have my flaws but I don’t think I need to relegate myself to a one piece just to make other people feel better, either. Especially when they were so openly rude about it! πŸ™‚

  2. If I still had a bikini body I’d totally be showing it off. What’s wrong with being a hot Bikini mom. They’re just jealous of you and your confidence. Tankinis are a pain because they can come up easily in water and then….what’s really the point??

    Loved the blog. I will be back!

    • Thank you so much! I mean, it’s one thing to wear a tankini, it’s another to giggle and point at people. It was so rude! I can’t abide by people that act like that. πŸ™‚

      • People are just jealous! I would be. Unless I lose the weight I would need to and either find a way to hide my scar Id rock the bikini!

        You go girl!

      • Lol Thanks! I have a scar, too, which is why I’m picky with my suits. And I just bought it! I’m not buying another one lol.

        Besides, tankinis only look good on women with big boobs. Which I do not. You don’t see me eyeing your cleavage in disgust, do you? πŸ˜‰

  3. Good for you!!! There are too many people in this world that are judgmental. I have always told my kids that people who look down on others are typically jealous and/or envious of what it is they are being judgmental about. I try to encourage them NOT to worry about what others think!! This life is too short to worry about what others think!!!

  4. I once bought a one piece that, unknown to me, was the exact color of my skin. From far away I looked naked. I didn’t realize it until I went to camp, and all the guys kept staring at me. Of course it was my only suit so I had to wear it all 5 camp days!

  5. My husband and I took our son to the pool last summer and I wore a bikini. The stares from the other moms were so obvious that even my husband picked up on them. I cannot believe how judgy moms can be. How about we focus on the awesome fact that you spent the time to get ready and took your kiddo to the pool? I’m sure your son didn’t give a thought to what mom wore because he was too busy having a great time with you. Good on you for standing up to those moms.

  6. Wow could they make it any more obvious that they were jealous? Good for you! Work that bikini! Own that bikini!

  7. Hell yeah. I wish women weren’t always so mean girls! Guys may be frustrating but they are SO much easier to deal with than catty women! Grats on being bikini wearable, I’d die first. πŸ™‚

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