Ahhhhh, so THAT is what men feel like when women babble…

Yesterday I had my 7-year-old niece all afternoon. My beautiful, smart-as-a-whip niece whom I adore with all of my being. Although I did notice one tiny thing about little girls that brought me to a wonderful “AHA!” moment that I thought most of my male and female following alike could appreciate and find the humor in.

First off, we went to the store to get the ingredients to make some cookies. She told me about her new house, her dogs, her friends at school, how she is going to a new school this year, about her recent trip to the beach, her brand new shoes….Image

Well, you are getting the drift here.

At first, I was asking questions back and listening with rapt and appropriate aunt attention. Then, as the time (and stories) wore on and on (and on and on and on), my mind began to wander and I started to fade out a little mentally. I would hear her stop speaking and realize that she was looking up at me, waiting for a response and would immediately think, “Crap! I am supposed to answer here.” Then I would throw out a “Whoa!” and hope that was the correct way to go. I would hear the lilt at the end of a sentence and think, “That was definitely a question”, and so I would respond, “No way! That’s crazy! What do you think?” (Since I, of course, had no idea whether I supposed to say yes or no)

The more that this went on (and on and on and on) I was suddenly struck with a cold, hard realization like a lightening bolt through my overstimulated brain: This must be how men listen to us women!

I mean, I could not possibly keep up with all of what she was talking about. I did not know the people that she was speaking of with such familiarity, the places that she was (strangely) describing, or why she took so long to tell such a simple and direct story. Oh, and the sheer length of the conversation was nothing short of astoundingly mind-blowing. The girl had been going on (and on and on and on) for hours. No, there is simply no way that one could even begin to listen to this asinine babble with full attention. Yet, here I was, feeding into it like she was the most interesting person that I have ever had the pleasure of conversing with because I love her and, while ludicrously verbose, she is so stinkin’ cute.

ImageAnd, in that very moment, I genuinely felt sorry for all of the men of the world. Because, truthfully, we do not ever grow out of this particular trait. This is because -when we are just wee little girls- our parents treat us as though everything that spills from our tiny mouths is pure liquid gold worthy of the highest praise and admiration. We get a little older still and we have girlfriends that may be interested, or maybe not, but love to talk just as much as we do so they have to, at least, pretend to listen to have their turn to speak. We get even older and then we have boyfriends that are attempting to impress us and so they listen to us drone on and on until the sun rises and then they say that being with us talking until dawn is the most fun that they have ever had in all of their days.

But then, the poor guy that actually ends up married to us is stuck with that woman that has been told she was the most fascinating thing to ever grace this planet for 20+ years. And so we talk to you husbands like we always have…without abandon and never leaving out a single detail.

You poor, poor bastards. πŸ˜‰


It has one page. It says “Don’t talk so much”.

Photo Credit:






Amber Perea View All →

I'm just living minute to minute, hour to hour, day to day.

21 Comments Leave a comment

  1. I often zone out when my girls go on and on and on. I just say enough to sound like I know or care who said what to them. I remember though when my eldest was very young I volunteered on a childrens helpline. As part of our training we were told to tell the kids if they need to discuss something very important with their parents they need to alert them to it. Such as asking what time they could talk to them or alerting them to the fact that they had something they really needed to discuss. I, in my parental innocence was horrified, but now with a busy house and lots of coming and goings I see how important that advice was. Oh and the fact that to remain sane we often zone out! πŸ™‚

    • It’s funny, with Jp’s communication issues, I thought I would eat up having a kid to talk back to. But the truth is, on more than one occasion, I kept thinking “Neurotypical kids are HARD!”

      Seriously, girls never stop talking! Who could sit through that day in, day out?! Lol πŸ˜‰

  2. How uncomfortably true… as a daughter and girlfriend/partner and as the mother of an 8-year-old girl. I cringe when she asks me, ‘What do you mean when you say “hmmm”?’

  3. Does that explain why women indulge on filler words? Despite growing up in SoCal, it exasperates me having to hear girls saying “like…” in every single sentence. In fact, I want to completely break that habit myself. But it is almost as impractical as eliminating our use of figurative language.

    • I think filter words help keep the thinker on track. But that’s just a theory! I happen to love them (this made apparent in my blog)! But to each their own, I suppose. πŸ™‚

  4. I actually have a son that out talks both of my girls put together…. And they talk ALOT! I think it’s more than okay to tune out on occasion!!

  5. I am the man at my house. My husband never talks except at home, and there he never EVER shuts up. And he gives every EVERY detail of his day at work. Even the bathroom ones. It makes me insane, but if I even gently suggest that he shorten it, I am blasted with his unsupportive wife speech. I cant talk about work, Im a nurse, and I DONT WANT TO. !!!! So I understand from the men’s point, as long as they keep work…at WORK!

    • Lol My husband NEVER talks about work…except when he wants my advice on how to handle and tricky situation with superiors or to help him write his yearly review. πŸ˜‰

      But I’m a stay at home mom with a child that can’t answer a question. When he comes home, I can’t help it! I’m like, “yay! A grown up!” Lol πŸ™‚

    • I’m in the same boat. My wife is a teacher and she longs to go home at the end of the day to silence. When I come along with 2 small chatty kids in tow she just grits her teeth and tries to smile. Sometimes she actually hides. Those are usually the days when I want to share all the great knowledge I’ve learned from public radio.

  6. Another great post and I had to chime in since I have a very talkative 8 year old sister. It’s gotten to the point where I have to ask her to play the quiet game once in a while. I love her, but oh my God, she’s never silent long. James is the one that tells stories where he adds in details that aren’t necessary and they go on on. I have to bite my tongue so I don’t say, “Get to the point already!” I have to laugh when he complains about Allie’s stories because he is just as bad.

  7. Whatever. Men can fucking listen to us talk incessantly to make up for the fact that no human comes out of their vagina, ever. We might call it even after 20 years, lol.

  8. Despite the lack of “meaningful communication,” Stella NEVER SHUTS UP. There is a constant string of words: nouns, recitations, TV reenactments. It makes me drunk.

    • Jp talks but not incessantly. He actually is really into being “plugged in”to an electronic. But he repeats a lot and that makes me drunk. πŸ˜‰

      As in, if you don’t respond immediately to what he wants, he will repeat it until you do. Problem solved. πŸ˜‰

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