Shameless Self Portraits: I am never going to grow up because I was awesomely naive and I miss that..

Life inevitably changes us. It’s ups and downs harden us, the failures make us more prepared for the next hardship, the moments of despair help us to grow a protective thick skin that makes us resilient. People, by nature, truly are survivors. We endure, we grow, and we change over the many years and life lessons that we are presented with.

I am a person that has been through the ringer (twice, even) but something about me will never really -truly- grow up.

I like being different. I like standing out. A piece of me will always be that insecure girl that “faked it until you make it”. And although part of me is older and wiser…another part will always be idealistic and silly. I like that part. I embrace it with open arms. I will forever hold onto that minuscule fraction of me that is young and stupid and impetuous.

Because I was fun without consequences and life was nothing short of limitless then. It was a time of magic.

The little things that I can do to tap into that wild girl (without actually being dangerous or stupid), I like to do. I like to be that person that did not know yet of some of the ache and regret that comes with adulthood.

And so I did this….

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You know why? Because why the hell not? I used to live to dye my hair every color under the rainbow– sometimes all at the same time. I loved it. And, as I explained, a part of me will never, ever grow up.

I thought it would be fun, make me feel young again, to again be that girl that camped out in lines all night for concert tickets (BI: Before Internet), and remind me of what it was like to be totally control of my own destiny. It did. To top it off…I think I totally pull it off even for an old chick.

So go do it. Whatever “it” is that makes you go back to your roots again, just do it. Being a mom and a wife is something that changes you…sometimes to the point that you can almost forget who you were once upon a time. And while these changes are positive and necessary, it is also nice to reconnect with the person that brought you there.

Celebrate the pre-mom you. Whatever brings you back there: blue hair, old music, or break out some old styles. That confused and stupid girl that you used to be grew up to be the woman and mother that you became. Love her for all of her flaws.

She lived through all of your mistakes to make you who you who you are today.

Parenting

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Amber Perea View All →

I'm just living minute to minute, hour to hour, day to day.

24 Comments Leave a comment

  1. Lookin’ good, even for an “old” broad, momma! Sometimes you have to remind yourself that you’re a woman still, even if you’re a beat down mother of a woman most of the time. Lol. Good for you!

    • Thank goodness for make-up! I have no idea how dudes are so supposed to “grow old gracefully” when they can’t cover up all of that crap! πŸ˜‰

      And thank you, oldest blogging friend. πŸ™‚

      • I know, right? If we were in high school or college still I’d have found a reason to break this off with you by now! I mean it’s been like 7 months plus already! Blue hair may have been the perfect excuse. As it is, I’ll take all the friendship I can get at my age, blue hair or not…lol.

      • True. But my blue hair is helluva lot sexier than that Barbie bike picture so….I TOTALLY would have broken up with you.

        Plus there is that whole “you’re not Mexican” thing… πŸ˜‰

  2. I agree with you about not losing the old “you” after becoming a momma. Sometimes you need to take a step back (in time) and just be you. I am a natural red-head and have never died my hair so I can’t go that route… I need to find something… hmmm – maybe I’ll just jam out to some great 80’s tunes while my children watch me dance – in horror….lol. That sounds fun – until reality eventually screams out – “Hey dork – finish making dinner!!”

  3. In 37 days I turn 40. That is a horrendous thought. I’ve often thought about going platinum but have never had the balls. Maybe sometime in the next 37 days….
    Love the blue!!

  4. Love the hair. Great post. As we have already discovered we have a lot in common, hair dye and tatoos! I have to run the gauntlet of four childrens opinions and a husband. They rarely approve of me and for me that is perfect. I have not and will not ever fully conform. My other trick is to stay away from the mirror.

    • Hear, hear sister. Growing up is boring. My husband says he likes it and that is all that matters. Secretly, I think he just wants me to dye his since his grey is coming in at full force now! πŸ™‚

      The trick is to not stare too hard at the mirror, right? That, and NEVER look at pictures of when you were young. “Just look at my skin…it was flawless.” Lol Thank goodness for make-up!

  5. I’ve been thinking of doing something different and unexpected with my hair…this may have just given me the push I needed. I couldn’t agree more that becoming moms and even wives should change us completely.

    • It does and it should. But being the mom that YOU want to be is key. Moms that give up their whole lives and being to be a person that they think they should be end up resenting their children eventually. Or that really old chick in a bar trying to “find their youth” when their kids are grown lol. Be a mom, be you, embrace all of it.

      What people think is their problem, not yours. πŸ™‚

    • Oh, this bright of a color? Totally bleached it. Go big or go home! I wanted to be in love with it and that wouldn’t have happened if it was a grungy blue over my mousy color (It’s darker on the lower layers). I have wanted to do it for YEARS but always had an excuse not to…and now I don’t. Carpe diem up in here! πŸ™‚

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